In Memoriam - "Vita Mutatur Non Tollitur"

Anthony Alessi - July 7, 1940 - July 11, 2024

Anthony M. Alessi Jr., lovingly known as Tony, passed away July 11, 2024, in Brick, NJ .

Born in Passaic, NJ to Anthony and Ann Alessi on July 2, 1940, he lived an admirable life, full of passion, commitment and love, leaving this world at the age of 84.

Anthony's life was marked by his unwavering dedication to his family and his community. He is survived by his cherished wife of 65 years, Rosemarie Alessi; his devoted son Mark Alessi and daughter-in-law Maria; his sister Dorothy Alessi; and his adored dog, Jovi.

Having grown up in Clifton, NJ, Anthony dedicated 32 years of service as a fireman, retiring as Deputy Chief of the Clifton Fire Department in 1998. His bravery and leadership were not only evident in his professional life but also in the way he conducted himself daily. After his retirement, Anthony and Rosemarie moved to Manchester, NJ where they have resided since.

Anthony's zest for life was contagious. He cherished days spent on his boat, his spirit at home among the waves. Together with his wife, he explored the world on 23 cruises, creating a tapestry of shared memories.

Anthony will be deeply missed by all who knew him.

Services will be held privately.  In Lieu of flowers, the family requests donations be made to the American Heart Association. 

To leave a Memorial Tribute to Tony, CLICK HERE.

Bernie Barry - October 25, 1940 - August 28, 2019

Bernie died peacefully at home in his waterfront Pompano Beach condo on August 28, 2019. He was born on October 25, 1940, in Jersey City, New Jersey and is predeceased by his parents Bernetta and Patrick Barry and his only sibling Patrick Barry. He was the loving brother-in-law of Charlotte and uncle of nephews and nieces, Patrick, Brendan, Amanda, Adrienne, and Noel Barry and grandnieces and nephew, Bridget and Josephine Barry and Campbell and Declan O’Neal. He was raised in a large extended Irish family and is survived by numerous cousins.

Bernie lived on Cape Cod for many years and was the successful owner of the Old Kemah Tavern in Harwich Port. Bernie attended St. Aloysius Elementary School, where he was an Altar Boy, St. Peter’s Prep, and was a 1965 graduate of St. Peter’s College. Bernie was a US Army medic and veteran.

Bernie had a rare magnetic, authentic, and charismatic personality and during his life maintained friendships from his school days as well as the many friends, he made as an adult and kept over his lifetime. He was an avid sportsman who loved skiing, handball, and boxing, and was proud of a daily workout routine that included numerous push-ups. He rode a motorcycle, backpacked across Europe, sailed the French Canals with his brother, and was fearless in his pursuits. He was a gracious host at the Old Kemah and worked alongside his nephews Patrick and Brendan as well as other relatives employed as summer help. Bernie always had a great story to tell and never left home without his Lacoste “croc.”

Bernie will be remembered for his humor, smile, energy, loyalty, great storytelling, and his willingness to try anything. He was always fun to be with and as one friend said at hearing of his death, “he left a hole in the universe.” Seamus, a cousin from Ireland, offered this prayer: “Ar dheis De go raibh a anam dilis, May his loyal soul be at the right hand side of God.”

A Celebration of Life at his Irish Wake will follow.

 Tributes to Bernie... 

Bernie Whalen
The last paragraph of Bernie's In Memoriam mentions his willingness to try anything. Yes, he was willing to try anything. I had a phone conversation with him a few years ago and he was most proud and excited that he just finished sky diving in Florida with a few of his relatives. He said it was one of the highlights of his life. Yes, he was willing to try anything. May he rest in peace. 

Bob Filoramo
Some time back in June, my cousin Eddie Burke sent me an email - short, simple: "Bernie's down to 105 pounds." No need to explain which Bernie - there is/was only one, something of a legend to a wide range of people.

I had no idea he was sick. I had not seen or spoken to Bernie in well over 50 years. I got his phone number from Eddie, texted him and said, "Hey Bern, I'm praying for you. God loves you and so do I." I didn't know if he was lucid or able to talk. Within minutes my phone rang. It was Bernie. We yakked, laughed, and laughed some more. He said, " I guess nobody thought I would live this long!"

This was the beginning of a renewed friendship, the first of many phone calls the next couple of months, where we rehashed old stories, adventures and laughed like crazy over some of the stuff we did, marveling that we somehow avoided jail time. During one of those conversations I told him that a lot of guys posted some very funny comments about his sky-diving adventure. He had no idea. However, he told me the only reason he did it was to please his nephews because Bernie had a fear of heights!

There are stories aplenty about Bernie. I will limit myself to just two. First, as I was planning to marry Nancy Marcello who was well aware of Bernie's "wild-man" proclivities, she did not want him to come to our reception, fearing he might "over-do it". However, Bernie was one of my best friends then; he was coming to the reception! Somehow, I managed to convince Nancy that I would have Bernie vow to behave himself. Reluctantly, she agreed; Bernie agreed, and we had a great time. Bernie was a model citizen.

Not long after we were married, we had a Halloween costume party with all of our friends. Bernie, of course was invited, but I doubted he would make it. He had been in a serious auto accident where he went through the windshield. Among other injuries, his face was badly cut in a number of places. He had as many as 200 stitches to put his face back together. Naturally, we were amazed when he showed up, but even more amazed that he had come as Carmine Basilio, a fighter whose face was a patch-work of scars, lumps, a map of his many wars in the ring. Bernie's face looked like a jig-saw puzzle with a piece or two missing. Once we got over our shock, we settled to having a blast....not sure who drove Bernie home.

After that, life happened; we scattered in different directions until that email from Eddie. I called about twice a week form June on until our last phone call on the day before he died. He could barely speak, but he managed to say, "getting closer", meaning death. My last words to him were, 'I love you Bern. I'll see you in Heaven."

I thank God for those great conversations we had those last months of his life and that Eddie was able to visit him at least twice, resupplying his Jim Beam, which helped him to sleep. May he rest in peace!

Capt. Bill Morrissy
We were friends from grammar school. A great guy.

Randy Orlowski
His obit and Bob's description capture his essence well; charismatic, daring, uninhibited and always entertaining. My nephew referred to Bernie as "the Ta Dah guy", always ready for the spotlight. I tell my grandsons that their best friends through life will be some of the classmates they're now meeting at their Jesuit high school. Bernie is a prime example; sixty-six years of continued contact with any lapses in months, not years. He was one of my parent's favorites and he frequently played handball with my uncle at the Bergen Avenue Y.

His adventures and close calls could fill a book and his weekend led escapades were Monday's topics de jure: pizza fights at the Keyhole off Newark Ave., Staten Island clashes with locals, calls to our parents from the Greenville precinct.

More than anything, Bernie was a true and loyal friend and would go out of his way along with Ed Burke and John Connors to honor my parents at their funerals and take part in my son's wedding in Maryland. Besides phone calls and some short notes I was lucky enough to meet up with Bernie on the Cape, in San Francisco where I received an assignment and we briefly crossed paths, three times when he lived in Florida as well as at NJ reunions.

I told Bernie one time that I was proud of his accomplishment in going into business for himself unlike some of us holding on to corporate security blankets. 

Uncharacteristically, he got a little choked up and I could see that my words meant a lot to him. He suffered quite a bit the last couple of years with severe neuropathy and was thankful the VA was a good source of help.

Those of us that knew him will continue to miss him.

 
Vince Grillo
I was not a close friend of Bernie's, but his quick wit and ability to see the comical side of things was what impressed me. That and his loyalty as a friend is the basis of his life-long friendships with many '58ers for so many years.

When I caught up to the Prep many years after graduation, as part of a report that Eddie Burke sent in to the Blog, I got a photo of Bernie with a mug that Randy explained he appropriated from a frat party at NCE, a year or two after we graduated. The smile on his face brought back memories of his sense of humor from back in the day. And as many of his friends will agree, he never lost it.

Rest in peace, Bernie...

To leave a Memorial Tribute to Bernie, CLICK HERE.

Thomas J. Belton -                              - January 5, 2020

Lt. Col., USAF (Ret.), Ohio Air National Guard (Ret.), passed away in Cincinnati, OH on Sunday, January 5, 2020, at age 79.

He was the cherished husband of 52 years of Lois Rupe Belton; loving father of Julieanne Belton Hensley (Diego Moena) and Sean (Julie) Belton; dear Pop of five grandchildren: True and Liam Hensley; and Andrew, Timothy, and Allison Belton. Tom was a family man and a patriot who enjoyed sports, politics, classic westerns and the music of Frank Sinatra.

Visitation will be from 5 P.M. to 8 P.M. on Monday January 13th, at the Vitt, Stermer & Anderson Funeral Home 4619 Delhi Pike. Funeral mass will be at 11 A.M. Tuesday, January 14th at Our Lady of Victory Church.

Donations may be made to the Wounded Warrior Project or the Vietnam Veterans.

This Obituary Notice was published in The Cincinnati Enquirer from Jan. 9 to Jan. 10, 2020

The following report came to us from Allan McCarthy on January 7th...
Tom took a serious fall on his driveway on Christmas Eve. He sustained a head injury and some spinal damage from which he was not able to recover.

In lieu of flowers, Tom's wife Lois has asked that anyone who would like to honor Tom's memory consider a donation to the Prep '58 Scholarship Fund in Tom's honor.

Tributes to Tom...

Allan McCarthy

Tom Belton and I were good friends throughout our lives, starting at the Prep and then in college when he joined me and Brian Dugan as a sophomore at Seton Hall University. We stayed reasonably close and in touch over the years.

My earliest memory of Tom was him snaring a pass on the far sideline and racing 65 yards to score a touchdown during a freshman football game at Old Colony Field. Our determined, but struggling, team was to score only one other touchdown that season so Tommy’s catch and run was as good as us winning the Super Bowl.  As seniors of course we turned all that around and shut out the first six teams we played in the 1957 season.

Tom had a big Irish personality, a booming basso profundo voice, a quick and hearty laugh, and as my brother Art remarked when I told him of Tom’s passing, was a “ really good egg”.  Everything we did together , even the mildly rascally stuff, was always with an eye that we not bring upset or embarrassment to our saintly Irish American mothers. God forbid!!!!

As Tom and I aged and matured we became closer kindred spirits with our common love and gratitude for our country and the opportunities it gave two Irish kids from Jersey City. We also reinforced our great love and gratitude for the Prep and all it did to prepare us for productive, morally right and successful lives.

We shared the fact that we both had been commissioned officers in the military. Tom was a true patriot. He was an Air Force officer and spent many years serving our country and ultimately accepted a position in the Ohio Air National Guard. He retired with the rank of Lieutenant Colonel. Knowing his love for our country and the Air Force, I feel in my gut that the recent very impressive “Elephant Walk” conducted by the military, where they launched 52 new F35 jet fighters split seconds apart, was a tip of the hat from the Almighty and the Air Force to the newest resident in heaven.

Tom, his wife Lois and his children, Sean and Julie, enjoyed their lives in Cincinnati very much. I am sure Lois and the children and grandchildren will long cherish the memories of Tom.

Rest In Peace, or in the Old Tongue, sosa i siochin, Tommy, dear friend.

Brian Dugan

Tom & Pat Fitzpatrick & I were good friends during our time at The Prep and Seton Hall... My Favorite Belton story is when we were seniors, Tom wanted to ask Pat Martin to go steady and he asked me if could borrow my Prep ring. I lent it to him.... several months later the romance broke off and Tom returned my ring but he had it sized to Pat's finger! I still have the ring as a fond memory of Tom!

Vince Grillo

I was very sorry to hear of Tom's passing. We were friends at Prep, especially in senior year. Hap, as he called himself when he signed my yearbook, had a great sense of humor, and was always around when you needed an ear. Rest in Peace, Tom.

To leave a Memorial Tribute to Tom, CLICK HERE.

Michael F. Bodner                             - November 17, 2015 

Michael F. Bodner III, 74, of Middletown, passed away suddenly on Tuesday, November 17, 2015 at home.

He was born in Jersey City to the late Michael F. and Mary (Ruskiewicz) Bodner. He was a proud graduate of St. Peter's Prep and College. Michael was a Senior Account Manager for Dun & Bradstreet in NYC for 35 years and was awarded the Presidential Citation eight times during his most successful tenure. Michael loved golf and enjoyed a loyal foursome playing on all the county courses. He was a communicant of St. James RC Church in Red Bank where he served as an usher and a familiar and friendly face at the 10:45 AM Sunday Mass.

He is survived by his beloved wife, Ann "Nancy" Bodner; his loving children, Michael, Christopher, Melissa and Jennifer; his grandchildren, Abigail, Michael, Aidan, Christian, and Allison, his brother, Danny; and his sisters, Magdaleine, Cecilia, Agatha, Winifred, Monica, and Daria.

A Memorial Mass will be celebrated on Monday, November 23, 2015 at St. Catharine's RC Church in Holmdel at 9:15 AM.

In lieu of flowers donations can be made in Michael's memory to the charity of your choice.

Michael Francis Bonifanti       August 11, 1940 - December 31, 2024

Michael Bonifanti, 84, died on December 31, 2024, after on-going heart issues. Michael is survived by his sister Judy Bonifanti, brother Nick Bonifanti (Carol Hokana), nieces ShanShan (Brett) Francis and Bo Bonifanti, and his close friend David Arnold, who was by Michael's side almost daily for these last four months. Michael was predeceased by his parents Frank W. Bonifanti and Teresa M. LaManna, his brother Tom, and his sister Diane. This soft-spoken, gentle man will be greatly missed.

Born in Scranton, Pennsylvania, on August 11, 1940, Michael graduated from St. Peter’s Preparatory High School (Jersey City) in 1958. He spent seven additional years with the Jesuits: one at the University of Scranton; four at the Novitiate of St. Isaac Jogues, Wernersville, Pennsylvania; and two more at Loyola Seminary, Shrub Oak, New York. While at Shrub Oak, he received his Bachelor of Arts in Classics from Fordham University, College of Philosophy and Letters, in 1965. Michael earned a Master’s in Social Work from New York University.

Michael was employed as a social worker by both Catholic Charities and Jewish Charities in New York City; he was also employed for many years by the record-plating company Europadisk. Michael’s final paid employment was as an usher for the Metropolitan Opera House.

For nearly six decades, Michael resided on West 73rd Street, just a few hundred steps from Central Park, the true love of his life. Central Park was Michael’s playground, his classroom, and his place of worship. He worked tirelessly for its preservation and its beautification. Central Park allowed Michael to pursue his knowledge of birds, plants, dragonflies, butterflies, mushrooms, rocks and minerals.

Michael’s philanthropy extended to the environment, wildlife, the arts and sciences, public broadcasting, gay rights, human rights, and those with food or housing insecurity. Michael’s final year was spent at Atria West 86 assisted living facility where he immediately became a beloved resident and a member of its evening movie selection committee.

Services will be private and Michael is in the care of the Aloia Funeral Home/Attentive Cremation Service, 180 Harrison Avenue, Garfield, NJ (973-340-7077).

In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to The Nature Conservancy  (https://www.nature.org/) or the charity of your choice.

To leave a Memorial Tribute to Michael, CLICK HERE.

Nicholas Thomas Brescia                               - July 29, 2022 

 Nicholas Thomas Brescia, 81, of Old Bridge, passed away at home on July 29, 2022.

He was born to late Nicholas and Genevieve Brescia in Jersey City, NJ. Nicholas lived in Union for some time before becoming a 50 year resident of Old Bridge He was a veteran of the US Army and worked for Blonder Tongue in Television Electronics.

Nicholas is survived by his loving spouse of Judy, and sister, Janet Brescia. He was preceded in death by father, Nicholas Brescia, mother, Genevieve Browski, sister, Diane Brescia.

Services are private and under the direction of Old Bridge Funeral Home

 Tributes to Tom

Bob Filoramo
I spoke with Tom about three weeks before he died. I had not been in contact with him for some time, though I knew he was fighting for his life. "They kicked me out of the hospital" because there was nothing more they could do for him. He knew his time was very short.

Our phone conversation was filled with stories about the sometimes goofy stuff we did as Prepsters. We had gone to Coney Island more than once, always to renew the thrill of daring the famed "Parachute Jump" where we would ride in tiny seats to the top with a great view of Brooklyn and the Atlantic Ocean. When we hit the top, a sudden release and drop left our stomachs in our mouths, followed by wild yahoos as our "parachute" opened and we headed for the boardwalk below, only to turn around, get back on line and do it all over again.

To commemorate our Coney Island adventures, we would get our picture taken together in one of those old, pay a quarter, pull the curtain phone booths with just enough room for one. I still have at least one picture of the two of us crammed in, laughing hysterically.

I thank God I had a chance to reminisce with "Tommy" before he went to Glory. He was a good man, a faithful husband to Judy and a dear old buddy. May he rest in peace.  

To leave a Memorial Tribute to Tom, CLICK HERE.

John Pearse Cashman  -  June 19, 1940 - April 19, 2015 

J. Pearse Cashman, the son of Thomas and Clara Cashman, passed away on April 19, 2015 at the age of 74. He was born on June 19, 1940 in New Jersey and was a longtime resident of Rancho Palos Verdes, California.

He is survived by his wife, Evelyn Cashman; Funeral Mass and interment will be held Monday, May 4th at St. John Fisher (5448 Crest Road, Rancho Palos Verdes 310-377-5571) at 11am.

In lieu of flowers please make donations to Torrance SERTOMA Club..

To leave a Memorial Tribute to John, CLICK HERE.

Joseph Cocca                   - September 13, 2017 

Joseph L. Cocca, 77 of Toms River, passed away Wednesday, September 13, 2017 in his new home in Brick.  Joe worked for Stop & Shop of Cranberry before his retirement.

He loved his garden and enjoyed working in his garage.

He is survived by his wife of 52 years Dorothy (Cornish) Cocca; sons, Joseph and his wife Kristen and Michael; his cherished grandson, Kyle and his sister, Lois Garrison and her husband Bob.

Visitation will be Friday 2-4 & 7-9 pm at the Silverton Memorial Funeral Home, 2482 Church Rd., Toms River, NJ. Funeral service will begin 8pm at the Funeral Home, Cremation will be Private Published in Asbury Park Press on Sept. 14, 2017

To leave a Memorial Tribute to Joseph, CLICK HERE.